We noticed that in the jewelry stores they had some of the articles marked "gold" and some labeled "imitation." We wondered at this extravagance of honesty and inquired into the matter. We were informed that inasmuch as most people are not able to tell false gold from the genuine article, the government compels jewelers to have their gold work assayed and stamped officially according to its fineness and their imitation work duly labeled with the sign of its falsity. They told us the jewelers would not dare to violate this law, and that whatever a stranger bought in one of their stores might be depended upon as being strictly what it was represented to be. Verily, a wonderful land is France!
Mark Twain, innocents Abroad

Mark Twain's description of France is exactly what we Chinese feel (well, most of us) when we came U.S. The cleanness of the street, the credit system (i.e. liars will be punished), etc, etc. A friend of mine says that today's China is exactly what America was 100 years ago. He was talking financial system, hope it is true for other aspects too. Many of our Chinese folks refuse to view history as a developing scheme, they tend to contribute America's accomplishment to its culture as today, while I believe many of today's culture is a product of America's accomplishment. I am not a very social person, and from time to time, not able to articulate my idea. I can only express my disagreement, and hope the best for China in heart.

As Chinese people becomes more affluent, more of us begin to travel abroad. Maybe someday someone will write Chinese version of Innocents Abroad.

Watched a documentary about Harry Truman.

It says he is an accident of democracy, maybe.

It says he spent last years of his life, searching for excused to defend his decision of dropping atomic bomb on Japan. It is rather sad, I think, because he probably know it wasn't right to drop the bomb on civilians, otherwise why did he give military to decide when and where to use the bomb at the beginning? (so called auto pilot in the film), and his decision is just "it's ok to use the bomb". Maybe he was trying to escape the responsibility, even though he knew he couldn't. Sad.

What touched me most is his relationship with his wife Beth, or rather the letters between them. Letter after letter, he repeated how he appreciated Beth's letter, how her letter made his day. It's nothing, or even laughable before they were married, everyone can write such letters, escpecially that kind of clumsy letter from a nerd. You can call that young love (even Truman wasn't exactly young at that time). But when he was over fifty at Washington as a senator, that plain language sounds like poem

2006年4月27日早的梦。
昨晚搬家，开着U-Haul跑来跑去，不知此梦是否与此相关。
我和某人（似乎年长于我，或者职位高于我）走在水边（也许是海，也许是泳池，也许是浴池），走着走着，感到最里面的一颗牙松动了，伸手去摸，竟然掉了下来。牙齿的末端尖尖的，但被锯下了一小段，梦中的我知道这是医生动过手术的痕迹。用手轻轻地一捏，那牙碎成了几块。之后不知道为什么去潜水，不记得发生了什么。然后满口的牙都碎了，含在嘴里，像是咬碎了的水果糖。我吐出牙的碎片，注意到那些牙的末端是完整的。
之后的事情记不清了，似乎是梦见上面那些的是个梦，我从梦中醒来，开始进行自由联想，试图解释那个梦。好像是从“牙”开始，床，睡觉。。。很快又回到“床”。梦中的我脑子里有两个声音，一个说，不对，怎么又回来了，另一个说，不要打断联想，继续。（这一段，大概是因为最近在看Jung的书）
之后就记不清了。

偶尔在网上看到这边某人的主页，是她写的一些诗，格律体的古诗。
才华远在我上。但我并不羡慕，毕竟自己没有选择，也没有机会选择那方面的发展。
可是，诗里所展现的，却是我早已失去，也无法追回的，不知愁滋味，独上高楼的青春。
如今寻遍心底，也找不到曾有的那一点点幼稚，一点点惆怅。

少年不知愁滋味，
爱上层楼，
爱上层楼，
为赋新词强说愁

如今识尽愁滋味
欲说还休，
欲说还休，
却道天凉好个秋。


我大概还没有识尽愁滋味，也自然谈不上欲说还休。一来长大了，变俗了，总是想着能赚多少钱。二来精神上追求的趋向理性化，总是想了解宇宙的起源，人类的进化之类的东西，大概是因为还无法忘记小时候想当科学家的梦想。

也许，也许，潜意识里在压制任何伤感的念头，因为年纪大了，经历了几次失败，任何的伤感将不再是无病呻吟，而是真真切切刻在心头的痛。

没事的时候还是多照些照片吧。

Thinkers to Read

Renaissance

Bacon: empirical method

Enlightenment

Kant: Dare to know! Have the courage to use your intelligence

Rene Descartes: total reliance on reason. I think , therefore I am

Adam Smith

Rouseeau, "Social Contract"

Liberalism

Natinalism

Romanticism

Communism and socialism

Realism

Charles Dickens

Eduard Bernstein "Evolutionary Socialism"

Fredrich Nietzsche

Sigmund Freud

Herbert Spencer, Houston Chamberlain (Social Darwinism)

Tolstoy, "Crime and Punishment"

Carl Jung

昨晚看了Discovery Time 频道的China Rises。

一个久违了的世界。北京，上海的喧嚣，农村的贫乏。大款们，小资们，穷人们。一切那么的熟悉，可是又很陌生。

也许在国外呆得太久了吧，扳着手指头算一算，已经快五年了。觉得自己渐渐漂走，远离了那个世界。

美国不是自己的家，只身一人活在异乡。

那边就是自己的家么？回去能适应那儿的拥挤，喧嚣，能够趋炎附势，放下自己的虚荣么？

如此的两难，大概是每个出国的人都在面对着的吧。

可是，仍然忍不住幻想，回国，热血澎湃，作一番事业。

体重首次超过150磅，大概是135斤吧。
最近一直在猛吃，企图增加些体重，
可惜，似乎增加的重量都是肚子上的脂肪。
明显看到肚子鼓起来了。
以前能穿的裤子穿不上了。
洗澡的时候抚摸自己的肚皮，不再是平平的，已经形成了两个侧面。
想象着有朝一日，肚子越鼓越大，
低头看不到小弟弟，看不到脚趾头。
轻轻地在肚皮的侧面一拍，
一阵波浪从一侧传到另一侧，
使肚皮轻轻颤动，久久不息。

Inspired by the most logical race in the galaxy, the Vulcans, breeding will be permitted once every seven years. For many of you this will mean much less breeding, for me, much much more.
The Simpsons, comic book guy

Aristotle's list of virtues:
bravery, temperance, generosity, proper self-confident, mildness, friendliness, honesty, wit, modesty

Why are these virtues? Aristotle give a list of goodness without define what good is. Maybe good is just good. Or is that because we want to be with someone that is virtues. If we examine the list, we may find that it is quite comfortable to live with a person who has these virtues. So maybe this is a requirement for others. But for some people, who are not selfish enough, they have to ask themselves to do the same.

Notably, 'modesty' is hardly considered a virtue in the west any more, unless you want to redefine what modesty is.

在看《笑傲江湖》，央视版的。
怎么这么无聊。

在屋子里架起了小电视，DVD，躺在床上。突然意识到，有2年半没有躺在床上看电视了。一直都是电视放在厅里的。

“武侠小说是成年人的童话”，看着《笑傲江湖》里那些离奇的爱情故事，对这话更有体会。不过这次，自己已经是成年人了，不再有懵懂少年的身临其境，想入非非。

如果能发明一个洗脑机，把大脑再洗回懵懂少年的状态。嗯~~~，最好能早点发明，不然成了糟老头子，还当什么懵懂少年。

Aristotle's Character Types

Virtuous
Lisa, happily return the lost wallet to owner

continent
Lenny, returned the wallet, but fighting the temptation

incontinent
Bart, keep the wallet, knowing it is wrong, but can't resist the temptation

Vicious
Nelson, keep the wallet, happily gloating the owner.

Aristotle's condition for right action:
1. must know he is doing virtuous actions,
2. must decide on them, and decide on them for themselves
3. must do them from a firm and unchanging character

Why do we like Homer?

Maybe because his doing what we want to but dare not to do: not to be right, or virtuous, just be yourself, even it's obnoxious and annoying to the others. And his inability to control himself makes him not responsible for his wrong doings, and thus makes him not or less vicious, which we morally object.

Does this mean we, our society, are trying to redefine what is 'right', or 'good', or 'virtuous'? Is this a trend to selfishness? Will there be a day that helping others are morally wrong? Just like today we all make fun of Ned Flanders?

Probably all these don't matter, a happy person is a person who blended into the majority, who does not think to much, who make fun of anyone that is different from the majority.